St Tropez Express Sheet Mask

This self tan lark is such a bore isn't it? I bought these sheet masks a while ago but somehow couldn't find the time to apply it. The idea is you put on this sheet mask for 5, 10 or 15 minutes (depending on level of brown you want) and then rub in the excess and wait for it to develop.

Post holiday, I decided to give it a go. I left it on for five minutes. Let me be 100% clear about the results: I looked bright neon orange. It was fine to start with, I glowed gently after a few hours and thought, oh yes, this is great. I woke up the next morning, looked in the mirror and yelped. And I had to go to work.

I can't even begin to imagine what 15 minutes would look like. These are ridiculous and also, they leave you with a white neck because of the way they are designed. They have received rave reviews and I can't understand why. I am not the palest person to ever walk the earth, I am normal pale.

My strong advice is to avoid but if anyone wants to try it, I do have another one as they come in a pair.

CND Vinylux nail polish

We've not talked nails for a while. I have discovered CND Vinylux which lasts for a week with no chipping. And it really does. You don't need a base coat, you paint on two coats of the polish and the special top coat and bob is your uncle.

I had them done at the salon across the road from me and was so impressed that I invested in some colours myself. It's exactly the same as normal nail varnish in terms of application and it comes off with regular nail varnish remover. I don't know how it works but it does.

I bought these three colours from this site and am now cooling my heels before I start another obsession of buying 500 new colours.

Here are my nails in the blue which is exactly the same as the wondrous YSL blue. Disclaimer: these are done by the beauty therapist, not me. I am not that good.

If you find your nail varnish always chips no matter what you do, then give this a try.

Jo Malone

I have rediscovered my love for Jo Malone. I bought the Lime, Basil and Mandarin body and hand wash from someone off the internet for a tenner and have been loving it.

At the airport on my way to Mallorca I bought this.

Which is as lovely as it sounds. Fresh and perfect for a sunny holiday. Then CoverBoy rediscovered the Amber and Lavender cologne and yes, that's divine too.

Then I was shopping at the weekend to buy a leaving present for someone at work. She requested Jo Malone and frankly, who wouldn't? I found myself adding the Grapefruit body and hand wash to my basket for me.

The perfumes I consistently finish are Jo Malone. I mean, I wouldn't want to only have Jo Malone but they are always delicious.